


running in my bloodstream

by loveguilty



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, all characters except celesgiri mentioned in passing, danganronpa kirigiri spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 04:13:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29004279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loveguilty/pseuds/loveguilty
Summary: Kirigiri goes to visit Celeste in the middle of the night after Enoshima’s most recent prank.
Relationships: Kirigiri Kyoko/Celestia Ludenberg
Comments: 1
Kudos: 44





	running in my bloodstream

**Author's Note:**

> For context: I am in a Danganronpa RP Server; this server is a non-despair au - however Junko still pulls pranks. Her most recent prank that we are planning is her revealing our muses deepest secrets.
> 
> As for the Danganronpa Kirigiri spoilers: the only thing I know in certain is how Kyoko got her burns in. Everything else - especially concerning Yui is my own interpretation of what I have heard - and is canon in the server.
> 
> Shout out to the Danganronpa server for inspiring this and Kathy’s Junko for causing Kyoko pain

She is tired, that much she can tell. Sleepless nights since the sleepover from hell. Nights sitting on the roof with Oowada, wishing anything else had been revealed for her. She’s been through so much that she’s immune to associating anything she’s experienced with emotion. Enoshima could have chosen her first case, that’s one of her secrets - Samidare not trusting her, and tying her to a chair, the culprit, her supposed co-worker hiding in the chair, being held at knifepoint at thirteen years old. 

She would much rather prefer thinking about her being in Hong Kong again, her father shouting and sobbing at her grandfather down the phone, her grandfather standing as still as a statue as he founds out that is daughter-in-law has passed away, her kicking her feet while sitting on her grandfathers chair, seeing a white figure, ghostly standing there staring at her. Hearing her grandfather hang up the phone, then turning to her and they’re on their way again, heading to get a plane which destination is London. 

She has so much Enoshima could have chosen, so many tragedies in her life that bring her no emotion, things she could think about without even getting emotional. 

That’s why Enoshima chose what she did. How she knew, Kyoko will never know, it’s only on her medical records, and the only people who know about it are Makoto, her grandfather, and her father and by association of her father - Kizakura. Makoto is the only one she’s told willingly, told on another sleepless night, staring at the wall, like she’s doing now. No tears were involved, but her voice strained, and gave away her emotions easily - the need to cry was there when she told him. He had held her, told her that she didn’t need to tell him, but it was necessary. She had been lying about it for so long.

Kyoko Kirigiri is hiding severe burn scars they received from trying to play hero just before coming to Hope’s Peak.

She’s still clutching the piece of paper with her name and her secret on it in her hand. She’s contemplated ripping it up into tiny pieces, but her hands are shaking too much to do that, they feel clammy, sweaty - but she knows that the burns damaged the skin enough that they can’t do that anymore. The back of her legs hurt too - from where they took the skin graphs, itchy because she keeps focusing on her hands.. The gloves are off, they have been since she knocked on the door and she was ushered into the room by Celeste.

She doesn’t know why she’s here. Laying staring at the ceiling wasn’t enough, the scene playing in her head constantly. The itch on her back of her legs, her hands feeling clammy like they were almost the reason she was here. They gave her the need to tell someone. She had contemplated Oowada, when they were on the roof, but she couldn’t get the words out. She’s staring at the secret again, feeling like she did when she was seven years old, swinging her feet on her grandfather's chair. This time she doesn’t see a ghostly figure when she looks up - instead she sees Celestia Ludenburg. 

“Do not tell me that you are okay, Kirigiri. It is one in the morning, and when I came back into the room with tea, you didn’t even acknowledge me.”

“I just needed company.” She looks away from Celeste’s eyes, she knows she’s been caught in this lie since the start. 

“If you truly, ‘just needed company’ I would assume you would have gone to your boyfriend, and not myself.”

And there it is, the lie was easily caught out and she lets out a choked laugh. The thing is Kyoko can hide her emotions all she wants - she can lie about what she feels to any stranger. But when it comes to Celeste, she just can’t lie. Maybe it’s because Celeste is the queen of liars, or maybe it’s because she’s more open than she would like to be around her. She doesn’t know why, is it Celeste perceiving her that easily? Or does she just let her walls down more easily around her. 

She feels Celeste sit next to her on the bed. Grand Bois also hops up onto the bed, laying beside his owner who gives him a gentle pet, but she quickly turns her attention back to Kyoko, who is back to staring at the secret, and in turn her scarred hands. She can hear Celeste sigh gently, and then her hands are in Celeste’s, the piece of paper plucked out of them. Kyoko can barely feel it, but she can see Celeste rubbing her thumbs on the back of her hands. 

“It is obvious that it is the secret that is on your mind, dear Kirigiri, you’ve been musing over it for a few days, I can tell. Not only have you been trying to hide your hands more often, but Naegi has been doting on you. You look like you haven’t slept a wink since the secret was revealed.”

Kyoko looks up from their hands, to look Celeste in the eyes, they’re kind, looking concerned, obviously worried. Kyoko doesn’t say a word.

“You do not have to tell me anything, it is quite obvious the cause of them has been plaguing your mind. Just know I am here if you wish to.”

And with a shuddering breath, Kyoko Kirigiri tells her everything about Yui Samidare’s death, how she was like a sister to the younger girl. She recalls the burning debris, the panic she felt for the first time in her life. How it is the only time she let her feelings get the better of her, all rational thoughts being thrown out the window as she grabs the debris, the pain of the heat was nothing compared to the pain in her heart at the thought of losing the woman she saw as a sister. The back of her hands were also caught in the flames as she tried to pull it off of Samidare. She recalls herself kicking and screaming as the firefighters pulled her off the scene, declaring Samidare as dead there. How she sobbed all the way to the hospital, the pain not even hitting her properly until after her surgery, and for the first time in nine years, seeing her father who was sitting beside her hospital bed. His head was in his hands, and if you looked out the window, you could clearly see Kizakura trying to stop her grandfather from coming in, trying to give Jin a moment alone with her. 

She’s crying, she can’t tell until she finishes her story, her cheeks are wet. She goes to move her hands to wipe her cheeks, but Celeste stops her, and does it for her, gently cupping her cheek with one hand and wiping under her eyes. Kyoko just stares at her as Celeste takes her hands again, bringing one of them up to her lips. A soft kiss that again, she can barely feel, to her knuckles then to the palm of her hand. Celeste repeats the action with her other hand, and holds them again.

“Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me all this.”

Kyoko Kirigiri feels like she can’t breathe again, but this time it’s for an entirely different reason.

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr is love-guilty and my twitter is @iunarseas!


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